Okay I’m not the best grammaritician, but here I go anyway.
Today, I saw a kazoo voiced, bamboo legged, production assistant churning local organic butter under the Williamsburg bridge in his Ziggy Stardust uniform. So I launched a bowling ball into his stomach so hard that he sharted out his rooftop vegetable and moonshine breakfast. End of story.
Here’s it with correct grammar:
Today I saw a kazoo-voiced, bamboo-legged production assistant churning local organic butter under the Williamsburg bridge – in his Ziggy Stardust uniform – for CHRIST SAKES! Henceforth, I decided to launch a bowling ball into his stomach so hard he sharted out his rooftop vegetable and moonshine breakfast. End of story.
Makes it a little easier to understand. Come on Diehipster, don’t make us “haters” have to show you how to use a little bit of grammar to make a story more readable. Or maybe that’s your secret statement – that we are better than you in terms of qualification for job skills making it easier for us to come over and start working and start taking away your housing because we can afford it because we have jobs and you locals are losing yours because you never got a decent education in your non-magnet Brooklyn public school, which in and of itself is really sad and I apologize, but hey, this is capitalism, right? The best man wins? No, it shouldn’t be that way. That’s why we need Diehipster.com to remind us that we need to check the global forces that create the hipster plague.